Creating Your Wellbeing Legacy: Small Changes, Self-Honor, and Living Fully

Health isn't a destination. Your health is meant to make something possible. Maybe it's being able to get on the floor with your grandchildren someday. Maybe it's having the energy to build something meaningful. Maybe it's traveling, creating, loving, serving, laughing, being there for the people who matter to you. That's why I don't want us to spend our lives obsessing over health in pursuit of some perfectly optimized version of ourselves. I'm Dr. Julie Ta, and today is a very special episode because this is the final episode of our first season. Over the course of this season, we've explored so many different dimensions of health. We talked about nutrition, movement, sleep, hormones, stress, the nervous system, relationships, boundaries, connection, and the many ways our environment can shape our well-being. But underneath all of those conversations, there has been one question. What does it actually mean to live well? Because health isn't just about the absence of disease, it's about having the capacity to participate in your own life, to have the energy to do the things that matter to you, to feel connected to yourself and the people around you, to have a sense of meaning and purpose, and to create a life that supports the person you are becoming. So as we close this season, I want to talk about something I call your personal well-being legacy. When we hear the word legacy, we often think about what we're leaving behind. But I think our well-being legacy begins much earlier. Well, it's the way we choose to live today. It's the relationship we have with our bodies, the way we care for ourselves, the boundaries we create, the relationships we nurture, and the example we set for the people we love. So today I want to invite you to think about the life you're creating, not just the life you're getting through. Let's begin.

Dr. Julie, I can't believe this is the last episode of season one. It's been too many topics that we've explored, and you know, they've all been kind of leading us to this important one, which is legacy. Um, I'd like to know your perspective on that. When you hear the word legacy, what does it mean to you when it comes to health and well-being?

I think most of us when we hear the word legacy, we usually think about what we're leaving behind someday. But I think legacy is also being created while we're living. It's in the atmosphere we create around ourselves. It's the way we move through difficult seasons, whether we make room for the people we love, whether we're always rushing toward the next thing, or actually present for the life that's happening now. And whether we realize it or not, the way we live influences the people around us. For instance, our children learn something from watching us, so do our partners, our friends and colleagues. What are we showing them about what it means to live well? And not perfectly, and certainly I haven't done that, but perhaps our well-being legacy is less about what we eventually leave behind and more about what we're modeling while we're here. For instance, what do we value? What do we make time for? How do we make people feel in our presence? And were we actually there for our own lives? That to me is legacy.

I really love the idea that legacy is something that you build every day and not something that you leave behind when you're gone. Um, throughout this season, we've explored so many different areas of health. What have you come to believe are the most important foundations of a life well-lived?

Well, I think a life well-lived has less to do with optimization than we're led to believe. Of course, you know, we want to eat well, um, move our bodies, optimize, or uh, I'm not gonna use the word optimize, but you know, to sleep and take care of our physical health. That's certainly my perspective as a physician, and all of those lifestyle factors, of course, matter enormously. But I don't think we came here simply to achieve perfect biomarkers. Um a life well lived also needs connection. It needs people we love, people who love us. It needs enough space to notice beauty and experience joy. It needs curiosity, it needs purpose, and not necessarily some grand mission, but a sense that there are things and people that matter to us. And it needs the ability to be present because you can spend your entire life preparing for some future version of happiness. You know, I think we all do this. Well, when I lose 10 pounds, or when the kids are older, or when work settles down, or when I retire, when I finally get everything under control. And meanwhile, your life is happening, it's passing by. So for me, the foundation of a life well lived is not perfection, it's being awake enough to actually live in it.

Wow, this this is profound. Yeah, life is here. It's not something that you have to chase, or it's not something that it's gonna come as you achieve those things that you think that are important, right? Everything that is important to you is right here in this moment. And if you're not able to see it now, what guarantees that you're gonna be able to see it later on in the future, right? It can just be a a trick to just be pursuing happiness or pursuing satisfaction, right? When we can find satisfaction in this moment, even if it's not perfect or it's not ideal. Maybe ideal is something different than perfect. Ideal is our perception or or our desired outcome, and perfect is what is.

It's almost even the opposite, right? Like sometimes we think, no, this is not perfect right now. But what you're saying is what is in the present moment is what is meant for us, and that life is lived fully only in the per present moment, and that we're all not guaranteed a future, but our minds play this trick, like, oh, it's gonna be better in the future, I'll be happier, you know, in the future when I have this or that. Um, but then you miss out on life, right? If you're not fully present. And it's not like every moment is enjoyable, right? But that you you're awake, you're you're you're um fully living in in in the here and the now. And um, you know, I think that's what it means to live life fully and um versus chasing the future.

Yeah, see, not not every moment is enjoyable, but it's the moment that you have. And like you mentioned, no other moment is guaranteed. Everything that we feel like we're gonna do later on, we can do now. And maybe not those achievements, but what what is it that we're looking to feel in those achievements? And maybe if we think about that, then we can bring those feelings into the present moment just as it is. Well, th that is the key. And Dr. Julie, has your own definition of health changed throughout your career and your personal life?

Enormously. So I was trained in a medical system that is very good at identifying disease and treating it. And of course, that remains an essential part of medicine. But after more than 25 years of caring for patients, along with living through my own seasons of life, I see health very differently. Um I've known people living with serious illness who still have tremendous vitality, meaning they love deeply, they laugh, they contribute, they find meaning, they are very much alive. And I've seen the opposite. Um, people who um, you know, by most standards are healthy, they're not they don't have a major chronic illness, but they're exhausted, feeling overwhelmed, disconnected, and really not experiencing their lives. So observing this has changed my definition of health. I no longer think health can simply mean the absence of disease. To me, health is a capacity, meaning, do you have the physical, emotional, and mental capacity to fully participate in your life? Can you connect with others? Can you experience pleasure? Can you recover when life knocks you off course? Can you do some of the things that matter to you? That's a much richer definition of health. And ultimately, it's the kind of health I want for myself and for my patients.

I think this ties beautifully into everything that we have spoken throughout the whole season. That it's you know, it's not just about optimizing your health and oh, can your m biomarkers become better? But really, why do you want that? Why do you why do you even want that if you can't actually enjoy it? Health, it's a lot about how you live, maybe, or or what's the purpose of having good health?

Well, I think that's what vitality is about, right? It it's it's really all of the above where uh you're you're able to do all the things that you want in life, um, but that you feel good doing it. Um and not everybody has both, right? And and there are people who m you know physically may be challenged or um are living with a chronic condition, but perhaps they're fully present in their life and and and they're able to um find that meaning and purpose and joy. So it's it's really b both sides of that coin that you you want for yourself. Um and I I I guess I would call that vitality.

And that can all be connected, right? One maybe physical health can increase that vitality, and vice versa, your tending to your inner ecosystem can also better your physical health.

It's all interconnected. Um yeah, no, certainly um our physical health matters, right? That does inform our mental well-being. But I would say that our i i i i it it's really that chicken and an egg where our mental health and well our mental health and well-being, you know, our thoughts, our beliefs, um are very important in creating physical health. Um, so it's I guess it's like, you know, two sides of the same coin. I I don't I think that's a saying.

Yes, I I think that is a saying as well. And you know, we've talked about how people spend years prioritizing everyone and everything around them before themselves. What happens when we consistently put our own well-being last?

I think this is particularly relevant for women because so many of us become very good at being needed. And um, you know, it's something that we have a I'll just speak for myself. It's a hard time. It's uh I have a hard time not focusing on my own well-being and and putting others, you know, first. Um I think that's especially the case for many of us who who have children, you know, that need us, or aging parents that that need our care. Um so uh I think often there's not this one dramatic moment when we decide, oh, my needs don't matter. You know, it just happens kind of incrementally. Uh for instance, we skip the workout. It's what I did this morning. Um we stay up late answering emails. Um, we eat on the go. We eat standing in the kitchen counter, you know. Um we say yes when we don't have the capacity. We often tell ourselves, uh, I'll deal with me later. I'll I'll get back into my exercise routine. And later it can become years. And the cost isn't simply physical. Sometimes we become so accustomed to responding to everyone else that we lose touch with ourselves. What do I need? What do I want? What gives me energy? What am I tolerating that no longer works for me? So there's a difference between generosity and self-abandonment. We can love other people deeply without continually continually disappearing from our own lives. You know, that's that self-abandonment. Um and that's something to just, you know, bring to our awareness each day.

Wow, I really felt that part that you set up later can become years. And it it it's really true. We go through we get used to um putting ourselves last and then life just goes by and you know everything becomes a habit if we don't become aware of it, right? And I'm sure there's times like you're you're a mother, right, and a daughter and a doctor, and there's things to do, right? Like there's times where you really it's hard to put yourself first, but you kind of have to probably do it.

You kind of have to talk for what I don't do it very well every day, I'll say that. And you know, I think the themes of this show just you know they resonate in my own life, and that's why I I do enjoy speaking about it. It is definitely my own journey. Um, I would say, you know, for me personally, it comes back to this idea of self-honour. Um and, you know, it may not be an hour workout at the gym, but it's small things that I do for myself. And you know, it varies from day to day. So I skipped my morning workout, and um, you know, today I choose to eat better. Um and it may mean going to bed earlier today because I had a busy day. That's usually when I skip my morning workout, it's because it's a it's a busy day or something else is taking a priority. So yeah, it it is not easy to fit everything into one day, but that you have the intention of self-honoring. And um that helps me so that I don't lose connection with myself as well as um not do some of the habits that help me to stay feeling good.

And Dr. Julie, would self-honoring be the same as self-care? Or how do you see that?

Yeah, so I I guess they are that they are very similar. Um I stop using the word, I stop using the word self-care. Um sometimes it just doesn't resonate for people. It's like, well, yeah, I have to care for myself, of course. Um I like to say self-honor because it runs a little bit deeper. Um and so, you know, when we hear the phrase self-care constantly, sometimes, you know, it it can be burdensome or it gets reduced to like a spa day or a manicure, which again, those those are fine and good. Um but I'm talking about something a little bit deeper. And sometimes people, you know, use the word self-love, which is beautiful, but for many people it can feel inaccessible or it's a little hokey. Um, especially if you're struggling with yourself and being told to love yourself can feel like one more thing you're failing to do. So for me, self-honor feels gentler. Um, you don't have to feel wonderful about yourself every day in order to honor yourself. And to me, self-honor simply means treating yourself as someone whose well-being matters. And what that looks like um, you know, will change in one season. In one season, honoring yourself might mean slowing down. In another, it might mean taking a risk, or it might mean setting a boundary, or asking for help, going to the doctor is self-honoring, um, or making room for more joy. So self honor isn't always the the easy choice, but it's the choice that says, I'm going to stop abandoning myself in. In the life I'm trying so hard to build. Because the most important relationship we will ever have is the relationship with ourselves. And when that relationship begins to change, something else happens. Our choices start to align. Not because we're forcing ourselves to follow another wellness plan, but because we're beginning to live as though our own well-being actually matters. That to me is the heart of the well-being ecosystem. So thank you for asking me about self-honor. It's something that I'm um excited to talk about, and it helped me shift in better taking care of myself. Maybe it's semantics, but um it just resonates for me better.

No, thank you for bringing this new way of expressing that because it does run deeper, and I really understood it when you were sharing, you know, because self-care can just be do the things, the basic things that you need to do for your body or yourself to to live. You know, that could be even like taking a shower, because sometimes even finding that time is hard, right? Or sleeping or just the very basics. But I feel like self-honouring goes much more into listening to yourself as well. Like you met her and you met her and your thoughts and your desires matter. What do you need? What do you want? What are you thinking of rather than just do the very basics.

Yes, exactly. But e but but in addition, the very basics may be even easier to do when you have this intention of self-honour. You're more likely to do it comes from a a gentler place than you know, let me do my self-care practices. Um so yeah, it's it's it's both deep and you know, the day-to-day habits uh align with what you're needing. And it is that deeper listening to ourselves and and what we're needing, even moment to moment. Certainly day-to-day and of course over seasons. I like talking about seasons. Because they change, right? Um and uh each season does require different actions.

Uh I I really appreciate how you bring that back constantly to our awareness because we do change. We change, life changes, everything changes, and you don't really know when things are gonna change. Or sometimes you don't even realize when you're changing, and we can't really be stuck in the idea that what works today will work tomorrow. We have to be really attuned to what we're feeling and how we're evolving because needs change with us, right? And in the expression of who we are becoming. So I like you that you remind us of the seasons.

Yeah, I mean, change is the one inevitable part of life. Yeah, it's it's both wonderful and sad and scary. Um but yeah, uh life is about change. And our ability to adapt to those changes is I think you know, where we find resilience. Um if we can't adapt to the changes, then we we we stay stuck in a pattern that perhaps no longer fits what our needs are.

Yeah, and I think that that can cause a lot of friction within our health, right? Yeah. And within our health as well. Perhaps if you don't realize that maybe it's time to slow down and you keep pushing and pushing, then that might even affect our nervous system or our physical. For sure.

I see that a lot. And I think, you know, that that is so hard to accept. I think a a lot of women that I work with um have a hard time slowing down. You know, they're not used to it because they've been pushing for so long and it's worked for so long. Um, but then comes a point where our bodies will say, uh-uh, no more. And you know, usually there's a symptom or you know, some sort of health uh I was gonna say crisis, but that might be too strong. Just a um a shift that is asking us to re-examine how we live, how we approach um our health and what's needed. But yes, that this idea of slowing down is hard for us. And it, you know, doesn't necessarily have to be forever, right? Again, it the the beauty of the concept of seasons is that it it does change. And um, you know, it it may be a few months of slowing down to regain your health. And that is even hard for some of the high-performing, high-functioning women that I I work with, and and you know, myself included, um, but I have learned the lesson that I can no longer push, um, and it takes a toll. Uh and I'm hoping in the next season I'm gonna be able to push a little harder, you know, depending on what's going on in my life.

What came up for me as you were sharing this is that sometimes we associate slowing down with losing power or losing strength or losing capacity. And I think that's a mental shift that we have to do as well, because the need to slow down doesn't mean that we're failing or that we're or or that we're not strong. It just it's just different requirements, right? Because that strength means nurturing, but it doesn't mean that we're deteriorating, right?

For sure. And you use the word capacity, and sometimes it does mean we have less capacity, and that is hard to accept. I think that's where the resistance comes from. But we're not machines, and we all do have a limited capacity, and I think it's hard when the capacity is less than a prior season, and that's hard to accept. But it doesn't mean that the next season, you know, you won't have more. Um so I think, you know, the crux of it is we have to recognize what our body needs, and sometimes that's the resistance is, you know, but accepting that we're not gonna be able to do as much because we haven't listened to our bodies and uh we need to rest, we need to slow down.

I see. But I guess we can see it as, you know, at night we have less capacity because our day has already been full and we've already used all our energy. So at night we're kind of like needing to rest and recharge. That's just the natural flow. So maybe that season that you're in where you have less capacity is just because you've had a full season. Now you need to recharge. But there will be a morning or like the change of season where you will have more capacity if you dedicate that time to rest and recharge, right? That that's what you're saying. For sure.

And that's a good analogy. It's like if you had a really hard day, you know you need to sleep and rest and re-recharge. And the same can apply for like, you know, a three-month stretch, right? A classic season, a time frame of a season. Or it could have been like the last five years were really difficult. And you know, you were driving and pushing really hard, and now you you need to take a moment and um recover. Sometimes I call it a health sabbatical where you you just you you need to slow down to recharge and allow your body to kind of reset. Um I mean, I guess that's sort of a classic burnout, right? And so that recharging for you know a brief period of time, you know, to varies from person to person, will then allow you to do more in the future. But you know, you you have to recharge those batteries.

And you know, we we said we're not machines like we earlier and mentioned that, but even machines need to recharge. You need to plug them in when it's exhausted. Right? True. Like your computer will die if you leave it unplugged for a long time, or your cell phone. So even machines need.

Yeah, I guess we think we're better than machines sometimes. And the human body is amazing, it does uh so much. There's just such intelligence in in our cells and in our whole organism. But um yeah, it it also needs to recharge, you know, like our cell phones.

And Dr. Julie, speaking of recharging and this whole theme of self-honoring, how does the small changes that we make every day become part of a larger story of our health?

Well, we tend to overestimate what we can change in a week and uh underestimate what can change over years. Most health isn't created by dramatic moments, it's cumulative. Ten minutes of walking doesn't seem transformative. Um, if you if you um go to bed one time, you know, earlier doesn't seem transformative, right? One meal doesn't determine your metabolic health, but repeated over time, small choices change our trajectory. And I think this is incredibly hopeful because it takes us out of that all or nothing mentality. You don't have to reinvent yourself, you don't have to wake up Monday morning and become a completely different person. You simply have to ask, what is one choice I can make today that moves me in the direction I want to go? Then make another tomorrow. Small changes practiced consistently can create a surprisingly different life. So small changes, you know, day after day really matter and it can um accumulate and really change the trajectory of your health.

This is so important. I think in my own experience, I've been trying for the past two or three years to change certain habits or better certain habits or get into a a rhythm, and because I would go all or nothing, then it would just be so complicated with life because I was traveling a lot, I was doing a lot, and that perfection was just not aligned with my lifestyle. So there was always frustration in in those and when I let go a little bit this year has been so much better in that sense because I don't strive for perfection anymore. And like I strive for consistency, even in those you know, moments where I I can't be perfect, but I can do small things even in those uh unpredictable circumstances or traveling or ha or having people over or or events, then I can be more aware of my choices and not just oh it's not perfect, then I can't do it, and be paralyzed by that. And and I think that I felt healthier, like I feel better, and the process is enjoyable, and I think that I don't even want to get anywhere now. I just want to continue where I am. Whereas before it was always getting somewhere, but the process felt very hard. For sure.

You know, if you keep it small and simple, um, you know, for instance, um movement and exercise. I always tell this to my busy moms, you know, 10 minutes of like some, you know, calisthenics or you know, body weight exercise is better than nothing. And if you did that every day or five days out of the week, my goodness, you know, you would start to feel the benefits. But when it feels when it's so small, like, oh, a 10-minute workout, what is that gonna do? Um it does count, it does matter. It's better than if you did none. And also, maybe on the weekends you can do something more, but it's maintaining the consistency. I think that's really key. And making those small choices can be so helpful and and certainly um contribute to the the big picture. Um because you know, if you keep s saying, oh 10-minute workout, that's nothing I'd rather not do a workout than the next day same, then you're not working out anymore. Whereas, you know, a small 10-minute workout can be very impactful.

And I think that perfection is looking again to for that postponed gratification, whereas the small changes can be something that you're reaping the fruits of those small habits each day. Like it can be something that you do and enjoy every time you do them, and it's not just for what's coming later on. It just compounds over time and you'll feel better over time, but you can start feeling good by making those choices today. It's not like a delayed gratification.

Yeah. Well, I think also um you feel good not only from the benefits of, let's say, exercise in this conversation, but also you're choosing yourself, you're choosing to self-honor when you do that small action. And that feels good for our nervous system. It's like, ah, you know, um I'm taking care of myself. Um and you know, emotionally, psychologically, it feels good to again self-honor. Um, so a lot of benefits besides just working those muscles. Um and uh yes, there's there's like it's like compound interests, you know, little by little over time, um, you know, you're you're gonna make larger gains. But I think, you know, our culture is like big is better. Um you know, you want more of a good thing. I don't know how it's like, yeah, we don't appreciate just the small, consistent actions.

And and I do think that keeping your promises to yourself is really what increases confidence and self-worth because just like keeping your promises to your friends or your family, if they trust your word, uh if you say something that's gonna happen, then that increases the trust and the confidence in the relationship, right? It strengthens the relationship. Yes. And and I think that that happens with oneself as well. If you say you're gonna do something for yourself and you do it, then over time that compounds as well as confidence.

Well, I spoke about this earlier, the the importance of our relationship with ourselves. Like if you can't trust yourself, that's harsh, right? Uh on our nervous system and just our confidence in ourselves. It doesn't feel good to self-abandon. Not to mention that I think a huge motivator for so many people, and myself included, as we are on this health journey, is we we want to be well so that we can be our best self for those around us and to live longer so that you know we can um be here for those for my children, for instance. Um I I want to stay strong and healthy, you know, uh in my body and in my mind so that I can enjoy my life with them. So um, so many reasons uh to practice that self-honor. It not only helps you incorporate the habits to have a healthy life and live longer, but it helps you live better. And I think, you know, we started talking about, you know, the the the well-being legacy, and you know, I want to bring it back to where we started. It's really about the here and the now and living our best life in the present moment, you know, as best as we can. And that is, I would say that's the meaning of life. Um and it's not always gonna, you know, be our best life every moment, you know, that's not what I'm saying. But I think um if we connect with ourselves, our needs, then we have a better chance of feeling good and bringing our best self to those around us, and we we live a better life, leave a better legacy. Um and I know it's gonna improve our health, our physical health, our emotional health, our mental health. Um, and that's how it's all interconnected.

And Dr. Julie, sometimes we say start early, but is there a point where it's too late to change the direction of our health, or can we always begin again?

I think we have to hold two truths at the same time. Certainly there are things we cannot undo. We age, our bodies change, illness happens. Sometimes there are consequences we can't reverse. But I never want to suggest that if someone simply tries hard enough, everything can be fixed. That's not true, and it places an unfair burden on people. But the second truth is equally important. There is almost always something we can influence. We can become stronger, we can improve our sleep, we can learn to regulate stress differently, we can repair a relationship, we can find community, we can change how we speak to ourselves back to that relationship with ourselves. We can rediscover something that makes us feel alive. And sometimes the most important change isn't changing our circumstances at all, it's changing the way we inhabit them or how we relate to them. So no, I don't think it's ever too late, as long as we're here. There is still life available to us.

And Dr. Julie, you know, you share with us this beautiful concept about our health being an ecosystem, the well-being ecosystem. And if you could help someone understand one thing about that concept, what would you want them to know?

I would want them to understand that nothing in us exists in isolation. Um in medicine, we divide the body into specialties because medicine needs to organize information. But your body doesn't know that your gastroenterologist is separate from your cardiologist or your endocrinologist is separate from your therapist. It's all one human being. Your nervous system affects your digestion. Your sleep affects your hormones and metabolism. Your relationships can influence your physiology. Your environment shapes your behavior. Your sense of meaning can influence how you engage with your health. And that's why I created the well-being ecosystem. It gives us a way to step back from the individual pieces and see the whole person in their whole life. And increasingly, I think of an ecosystem less like a machine and more like a garden. You know, you don't stand over a garden shouting at it to grow. You tend the soil, you provide water and sunlight, you remove what is interfering, perhaps, the weeds, right? You pay attention to what the garden needs. You create the conditions that allow life to flourish. I think we can approach ourselves the same way.

And Dr. Julie, that's a beautiful analogy. I think that sometimes just by reminding ourselves of how nature operates, we can see ourselves better or we can see ourselves a little bit more clearly. And that again, that's why I'd like that you come back to the seasons, because when we see it in nature, then we can see it in ourselves a little bit more clearly, or we can understand that we have rhythms, right? You've spoken about those rhythms and we're connected. And speaking of that connection, you've talked about how your emotional health influences your physical health and so on. And I'd like to know how physical health, emotional well-being, relationships, environment, and our sense of purpose influence one another over time.

I think of it almost like a ripple effect. One change can travel through the entire system. So imagine someone begins sleeping better, suddenly she has more energy. With more energy, she moves her body, she has more patience with her family, she makes different food choices, she thinks more clearly at work. Maybe she even has enough bandwidth to call the friend that she hasn't spoken to in months. So nothing else was directly treated, but many things changed. Unfortunately, the reverse can happen too. So chronic stress can disrupt sleep, poor sleep can affect mood and appetite, we become more depleted, withdraw from people, move less, and gradually the entire system shifts. That's why I don't think we always need to identify the perfect place to begin. Sometimes we just need to find a place where change feels possible. And if you support one part of the ecosystem, you may be surprised by what else begins to shift, you know, when you understand this, you know, ripple effect across the entire ecosystem.

You always offer this gentle way of not adding more things to our to-do list. What does it look like to stop thinking about health as another thing we have to manage and instead begin creating a life that naturally supports our well-being? I think it's a gentler way of approaching our health, right? Rather than something else we need to add to our to-do list. For sure.

You know, I think this is such an important distinction because wellness itself can become stressful, right? Um suddenly, you know, we're tracking our sleep, counting our steps, measuring our proteins, meditating, um, taking 12 supplements, and wondering why, you know, we don't feel better. So I don't want health to become another job. I'd rather ask, how can I shape my life so that some of the things that help me feel well happen more naturally? Maybe walking becomes time with your partner. Maybe you stop bringing your phone into the bedroom, or you know, you keep food in the house that make nourishing yourself easier, or maybe you protect one evening a week from commitments, or maybe you spend less time with people who leave you feeling depleted, and more time with people um who you know help you feel relaxed, like you can exhale. So this isn't about constructing a perfectly healthy life. Real life will always be messy. It's about reducing that friction, which you talked about earlier, between the way you're living and the way you want to feel. Eventually, well-being becomes less something you're constantly managing and more like something your life is helping to support.

No, thank you for for bringing that distinction up. I think that I've fallen very hard on making wellness a priority, and then it's just another stress on myself, and then I think, oh, this is so ironic. Yeah. How health be so like a burden almost is not supposed to be that, right? It's not supposed to be something that we think about, and I think that's kind of what you meant in like making it a natural thing, just part of your life without having it to be on top of your mind all the time as something that you need to do. And I have a question for you, and I've been meaning to ask you this, and I and and I left it for this last episode, but if you could go back and give your younger self one piece of advice about health and well-being, what would you say?

Oh, well, there are so many things I would tell her. Um, I guess first I would tell her, trust yourself. You know more than you think you do. Listen to your intuition, listen to that quieter voice inside you, and trust that you don't have to control every detail of what comes next. You know, there were so many times when I thought I had to figure everything out, make the right decision, work harder, worry more, as if that's gonna fix it. Um yeah, somehow I, you know, I think we think worrying will protect us from that uncertainty. And of course it doesn't. So I would tell her, trust yourself and trust life a little more. Um, you know, I think after having lived so many years, you you start to recognize certain patterns in your life where you go through a difficult period, and in the moment it's it is hard. I don't like it, it's unpleasant. But then, you know, down the road you look back and you see all that you gained from that challenge and you know, made me stronger. Um and there was just so much benefit on the other side of it. Um, so you know, time does give you that perspective. Um and I guess I I would also say to myself, um, have some fun. I think I, you know, was so serious and just, you know, took life. I don't know. I guess, you know, the the worrying and then you know the needing the problem solve everything just um kept me kind of heavy. And and I I should I would have told her, my younger self, to have more fun. Um you know, don't postpone joy until everything is settled. Uh well, because everything is never completely settled. Laugh more, be silly, dance more. And uh I would say above all, be present enough to take in the good moments while they're happening. You know, I think I had a tendency to just focus on the problems, and uh I didn't take in all the good moments. And I think, you know, those of us who have um children who are like teenage and beyond, you kind of miss like those moments when you know they were little or when they were babies and they were cute and they wanted to be around you. I wish I would have taken in those moments more as they were happening. You know, I think in our younger self, we're always looking at what's ahead, you know, what's next? What do I need to accomplish? What problems do I need to solve? And um I think so often you just miss the present moment. So I I would tell my younger self to just be more present, you know, enjoy those little kids because they grow up really fast. I could answer more things I would tell my younger self. Um, but I would say, you know, those are the the top two things.

Trust yourself and have more fun. Thank you so much for um your wisdom, Dr. Julie. I think we all have that younger self in us still. So I think that there's joy in in listening to what our wife's self now has to say to her. And also you're you're saying that to me, and and I really took it to heart. So thank you for sharing this beautiful wisdom. I'm gonna keep it and I'm gonna you know, remember it. And I think that at any age it's is still very, very good advice to follow. Right? Have have more fun and be present and enjoy the good things that are happening while they're happening and trust your intuition for sure. Because we we do have that, and especially I think as women, right? We we do have a very strong sense of intuition. And Dr. Julie, for someone listening today who knows they want something to change but doesn't know exactly what that change should be, what question would you encourage them to ask themselves?

I would ask, what would it look like to honor myself in this season of my life? So earlier, you know, we talked about this idea of self-honor. Um I want to bring that back. I think, you know, very simply, it just means treating yourself as someone whose well-being matters and to change that relationship with ourselves and to um have this shift of self-honor will allow us to perhaps, you know, do those habits that will help us to feel better, you know, day to day. Um, but I think more importantly, it helps us to improve that relationship with ourselves and to um create more self-trust and self-confidence, and that really matters for everything, our physical health, our emotional health, and of course our well-being.

Dr. Julie, you've given us so much wisdom today, and like you always do, but I think this is a topic that goes a little bit deeper into everything that we've talked about throughout the season. So I would like to ask you to give one message to our listeners as as as they move forward from this season. What would you like them to remember?

Well, I would want them to remember what all of these conversations have ultimately been for. We've spent an entire season talking about health, but health isn't the destination. Your health is meant to make something possible. Maybe it's being able to get on the floor with your grandchildren someday. Maybe it's having the energy to build something meaningful. Maybe it's traveling, creating, loving, serving, laughing, being there for the people who matter to you, or simply waking up and feeling fully present in your own life. That's why I don't want us to spend our lives obsessing over health in pursuit of some perfectly optimized version of ourselves. Your health was never meant to become your life's work. It was meant to support your life's work. And by life's work, I don't just mean your career, I mean your relationships, your passions, your contribution, your joy, your becoming, your actual life. So after everything we've explored this season, perhaps the question isn't How can I become healthier? Maybe the more meaningful question is what do I want my well being to make possible? And then begin there. One choice, one relationship, one small act of self honor at a time. Because ultimately the goal isn't simply to add more years to our lives, it's to bring more life to the years we're given. One of the reasons I created the well being ecosystem is because I believe our health is something we cultivate, not something we simply fix when something goes wrong. It's about understanding the different parts of our lives that influence how we feel in creating the conditions that allow us to truly thrive. As we close this season, I'd love to leave you with one question. What do you want your well-being to make possible? If this season has inspired you to think differently about your health, I'd love to hear what you're taking with you. Visit me on Instagram at julie.ta.md and share your thoughts in my latest post. And if you're ready to explore your own well-being ecosystem more deeply, you'll find information about the well-being ecosystem in the show notes. Thank you so much for spending this time with me and for being part of Medicine with Meaning. Remember, your health is not just about how long you live, it's about how fully you're able to live. Until next time, take good care of yourself.